Politics

Trump Claims That His Perfect Wife Melania Doesn’t Poop Or Fart In Front Of Him

Every time a radio interview with Donald Trump and Howard Stern resurfaces, it just proves that the president is a lot more bizarre than we give him credit for. And a lot more disgusting.

In a 2003 interview, before Trump married Melania, he sat down with Stern to discuss how their significant others never “made doody” or even farted.

Trump: Howard let me just ask you. You said something a while ago about Beth that amazed me because it applies to Melania. You said you’ve never seen her do anything, like, bad, in terms of her own personal.

Stern: That’s true. She would never even do another chick.

Trump: No, no, not even that. You said you’ve never heard her fart.

Stern: Well, how bout this–

Trump: Is that true?

Stern: Not only is that true…

Trump: Isn’t that amazing? In years, three and a half years he’s never… Wow.

Stern: Not only is that true, she doesn’t make doody. She hasn’t made doody…

Robin: Never?

Stern: Like four times maybe.

Trump: In three years?

Stern: In three years.

Trump: Wow.

Stern: You think I’m kidding.

Trump: I can say the exact same thing about Melania.

Stern: How much does Melania weigh, do you know?

Trump: 125. She’s 5’11…

Stern: Perfect.

Trump: …125.

Stern: Wow.

Trump: And that’s good.

Stern: And she hardly goes to the bathroom?

The shock radio host and current President of the United States of America continued their conversations about Melania’s apparent gift of never having to use the bathroom, and start talking about her height and weight.

Stern: Does Melania work out or is that just natural?

Trump: It’s very natural. She works a little bit.

Stern: And she never makes a doody.

Trump: I’ve never seen any of that.

Stern: Wow.

Trump: It’s amazing.

Stern: You’re probably expecting a big one this year, though.

Trump: Maybe they save that for after marriage. Beth and Melania, maybe they save it for after marriage.

Artie: That is great!

Trump: But it’s amazing. You said that and I’ve never experienced that before.

Stern also asked Trump about the bathroom habits of his ex-wives, Ivana Trump and Marla Maples, and if he ever caught “a whiff.”

They also discussed a fantasy where they sit together naked in a hot tub while they Beth, Stern’s wife, and Melania perform oral sex on them.

And now the guy who bragged on public radio about his wife never farting in front of him is running our country.

Nicole James
meet the author

Nicole James is a lifelong Democrat and political activist who first cut her teeth as a teenager volunteering for Mike Dukakis’ presidential campaign. She has worked and volunteered for John Kerry, Hillary Clinton, HFA (Hillary For America) and Organizing For Action. She’s passionate about liberal and progressive causes, and considers President Obama her most favorite president ever. She holds her Bachelor’s from Boston College and her Master’s from Columbia University, both in Economics. When not working as a writer, she enjoys traveling and spending time with her three teenagers.

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